Dear God: The World's Expectations

What does it mean for something to be "bad"?

Dear God,

One of the single most difficult things I've had to deal with over the last 10+ years as a Muslim is how to balance Your decrees with the expectations of Your creation. The reality is that the expectations of our friends and family, coworkers, and fellow countrymen can sometimes be completely different from what You expect of us. Oftentimes, we end up looking like extremists or uber-conservatives that just don’t belong.

Sometimes I even feel unrecognizable to those I hold most dear.

Your beloved Prophet (s) gave us glad tidings. Us being the general populous of the Muslims and even within that group, there is a subgroup of those that hold tightly to Your rope in hopes that it pulls us into the Garden.

We are driven by fear and hope.

Fear that the world and all of its distractions are akin to the Fire, A Fire that though it is the worst punishment in creation, You wrapped it up with desires. It became so attractive to the point that even the blessed Angel Gabriel expressed his woes at how difficult it would be for us to avoid it.

Narrated AbuHurayrah:

The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: When Allah created Paradise, He said to Gabriel: Go and look at it. He went and looked at it, then came and said: O my Lord! By Thy might, no one who hears of it will fail to enter it.

He then surrounded it with disagreeable things, and said: Go and look at it, Gabriel. He went and looked at it, then came and said: O my Lord! By Thy might, I am afraid that no one will enter it.

When Allah created Hell, He said: Go and look at it, Gabriel. He went and looked at it, then came and said: O my Lord! By Thy might, no one who hears of it will enter it.

He then surrounded it with desirable things and said: Go and look at it, Gabriel. He went, looked at it, then came and said: O my Lord! By Thy might and power, I am afraid that no one will remain who does not enter it.

Yet we have hope that we will be able to.

It's difficult, though.

Especially difficult seeing mini fires all around us and attempting to avoid them only to be told by those within them that you're doing too much.

Allah, protect us from the Fire and protect us from ourselves.

I certainly don’t know it all, and that's also part of the difficulty. Constantly second-guessing if just maybe I am being too difficult on something that Your beloved Prophet (s) would have been more lenient on.

I mean,

Is it really that bad that they aren't praying on time?

Is it really that bad that they no longer dress in accordance with Your law?

Is it really that bad that they've decided their sexuality need not be dictated by any Holy Book?

Is it really that bad that their worldview is no longer shaped by You but by social theories by people who don’t have belief neither in You nor in any Divine Being except the Divine in themselves?

In my estimation, it is bad. It's horrid. And while none of the above are to be misconstrued as being of the same level, they are still all bad.

Or is “bad” just a social construct inflicted on us by some group of people with more power, by long-dead men, by the patriarchy, by religion… of course not. But you can see how that line of thinking can so easily become attractive.

But what about this…

Is it really that bad when I have sins of my own?

Who am I to maintain any level of conservatism when my sins stink as much as the rest?

Shouldn’t I chill out?

Shouldn’t I stop?

Shouldn’t I just let them be since at the end of the day I’m just as bad?

The constant internal self-struggle in attempting to lead, tolove, to guide is juxtaposed to being controlling, narcissistic, and toxic.

It’s hard.

And in all honesty, I have yet to figure it all out, so I call out to Al-Haadi to give guidance.

I call out to You who protected children simply because their father was righteous.

I call out to the One who answers when He is called.

I ask for a little help in following the path that leads to Your pleasure and blessings and not the path of those who have incurred Your wrath and those who have gone astray.

Let not my heart waver, my knees buckle, and my feet sink as I attempt to keep walking towards You, in hopes that You run towards me, and towards those whom I love.

Ameen

Your Servant, Naseer